


Get Some Tail

by AnGoose



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Mermaid Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 02:11:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21263396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnGoose/pseuds/AnGoose
Summary: For the Isn't it Bromantic? Fic-or-Treat.Wade never had a thing for fish before.





	Get Some Tail

**Author's Note:**

> For prompt #148: MERMAIDS (scary ones preferred)

Wade never really, seriously considered fucking a fish before. So he had to thank Fisk for that one.

To be fair, ‘fish’ was the wrong term for the creature. ‘Mer’ was the correct, gender neutral term for them, if he recalled correctly. And, if he recalled correctly, it was pretty much impossible to keep one legally.

Not that he thought for one second that Kingpin gave a shit about the legality of keeping a sapient creature in a glorified fish tank. The effort it had to have taken to paint even the thinnest veneer of respectability over his latest extremely public acquisition must have been staggering. Normally Wade would have mocked him, but when he finally caught a glimpse of the creature, he kind of understood the motivation.

Fisk had remodeled the skyscraper where he set up his main ‘office’ so that a network of aquariums connected throughout, which allowed the captive Mer some freedom of movement, at least. Not much in the way of privacy, though. Wade figured that was the point; why bother if he couldn’t show it off?

And this Mer looked like it was born to be shown off. Its scales were mostly a bright scarlet, with just a hint of blue around the edges. The almost lace-like fins were that same, vibrant blue. The human half was ever so slightly masculine, all flawless pale skin and muscle. His hair was just long enough to flow with the internal currents of the aquarium. And while his almost perfectly human face was lovely, it was the eyes that got to Wade. Big and brown, with a wicked sort of intelligence in them as he looked out at the people either milling around or gawking at him.

Then the Mer made eye contact with Wade and quirked his head to the side, something like a smile spreading across his lips, revealing sharp teeth. With a tilt of his head, the Mer pointedly glanced up, then began to drift lazily to the side. The crowd gasped in awe as he fanned out his beautiful fins in a spectacular display. Wade was too dazed to fully appreciate it and found himself pushing through the crowd to find a way upstairs; he was certain the Mer had been trying to communicate with him.

In the end, he followed the flash of scales up the entirety of the tower. He’d had to smash a few pesky security guards in the face with the butt of his sword, but it was surprisingly easy to get past Kingpin’s security. Then again, Wade wasn’t heading towards his office or anywhere that the ‘real business’ went down.

No, he found himself on the roof, where the Mer waited for him, his eyes just visible above the waterline where the tank opened to the sky. Curiosity piqued Wade slowly approached. The thick glass made an attack from the Mer improbable, and it wasn’t like lasting damage was a threat even if the Mer did somehow manage it.

“Hi,” Wade called, friendly. “My name is Wade. Nice to meet you!”

His Mer companion burbled and clicked. Wade was pretty sure that was some sort of confirmation of understanding, but then that could have been wishful thinking. He really, really wanted to be able to tap that tail, but he wasn’t one for bestiality, rumors be damned.

All doubt about the Mer’s intelligence faded when it lifted its hands and very clearly signed at him.

_Help._

Wade jumped in surprise, then nodded, “Sure thing, buddy. What do you need?”

The Mer looked at him speculatively for a moment, then signed

_Kill large man._

“Fisk?” Wade almost laughed. “You want me to kill Wilson Fisk for you?”

The Mer nodded enthusiastically.

It was perfect, really. If he killed Kingpin, he killed the one real obstacle between him and that sweet, fishy Mer…whatever their genitals were. Wade was honestly open to pretty much anything at this point.

“Well, sweetheart,” he practically purred, stepping so close to the glass he could make out the Mer’s eyelashes individually. What did they need eyelashes for? “I’m a mercenary. That means I help people for a price.”

_Price?_

“Yep. What can you offer me?” Wade wasn’t even trying to hide his grin behind his mask.

The Mer stared at him for a long moment before drifting away from the glass and diving down under the water to display his lovely fins and give Wade some of the most enticing bedroom eyes he’d ever seen.

_Enough?_

The Mer gestured down at himself.

Wade let himself laugh for real this time, loud and joyful. “I’ll be seeing you soon, darling!” he announced as he made his way back to the stairway. “Get your pretty fishy ass ready!”

He had a fish to fuck, and all because of Wilson Fisk. Now he just needed to convey his thanks to the man himself.


End file.
